Before this blog starts, I would like to make an apology. In my previous entry, (before sorting it out), I said that the person who wrote my now ancient dictionary was wrong to say that minor scales had a major 7th in them. Those scales CAN have those notes, but they more commonly have minor 7ths. I’m sorry for tarnishing the author’s name. Whoever the hell he is - my book doesn’t have a cover anymore, so I can’t find out. I hope you enjoy the following!)
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And yet another Facebook comedy contest that I’ve been running has finished! (Yes, I started a blog with ‘and’. It was a bit weird but again, it’s better than ‘so’, right? It’s nice to take things further). Who won, and more importantly than in previous competitions, who came second? Well, the runner up is a long time participant who never really got very high scores from me. His ideas were good, but how can showing a fake willy REALLY compare with videos making use of special effects and more adventurous scripts? Well this time his work was rather witty, if still low budget, and it wasn’t reliant on props that he got from God knows where. Good for him. But as you know, he didn’t win though. Who was the victor? Someone who did have a big budget and clearly lots of time on his hands; a Mr. David Clarke of Razorback Productions. He came up with a legit full blown rock music video called ‘Hot Dog Man’ which is a parody of Jimmy Barnes’ ‘Working Class Man’. What inspired the comic to make a leap from work to food, I will surely never know. Amazingly, his vid even featured a whole VAN with ‘hotdog man’ and a logo written on it, so he was certainly confident and correct that he was onto a winner.
The original and ‘updated’ songs are impressively similar in musical content and performance, though disappointingly the comedian failed to parody Barnes screaming his head off at the end of the song. That could have been great, but instead the humour was made more from the little things, such as using a hotdog as a microphone. It’s hard to put my finger on why, but people getting mustard and tomato ketchup sprayed on their faces works on some kind of a subconscious level. But wait… Now that I think of it, who is this guy making videos for? He only has a hand full of Youtube subscribers, whereas he should have thousands at very least to cover his costs. Well, now that he’s been promoted on this blog, I’m sure he will be ultra famous. Oh, but I haven’t shown you his video, yet. Here it is…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hjdXvdY_lbM&feature=youtu.be
Ok, that’s Razorback Productions paid tribute to. Now it’s time to beef this entry up as I almost always do by going off road. Don’t worry though, I will be doing so in a way I’ve (perhaps for the best) never done before. Here’s an interesting subject: Being a dick. It’s rarely considered a good quality, but can it be funny? Finding out on Youtube by spamming people is never wise, because you will at very best get your comments ‘thumbed down’. However, here in this safe space, it’s time to put some of my ideas to the test. I saw a video on the sharing site where a policeman accidentally shot his gun in a lift and it bounced off the wall into his stomach. (Don’t worry, he was fine in the end). I was thinking of saying ‘Cop Shoot Cop’, (that’s a band, btw) but I thought better of it. I also saw a music video that was around 15 minutes long, and someone said ’apparently this took 5 minutes to make’. Again, the rational part of my brain went into overdrive and into willy mode, but I just left it. Go me.
There are different methods out there if you want to be really annoying in more stealth ways; you can just confuse the hell out of people. For example, in a heated debate about any subject you can imagine, you can say any old nonsense such as ‘dead flies don’t sink’. (Though perhaps leave that phrase late in discussion, after you’ve built up some credibility). Sounds really deep and philosophical, right? Actually, it was just something I noticed whilst having a bath. (Yes I had a bath with a few dead flies in it, big deal). Perhaps you could also say the profound ‘rubber ducks don’t have to be small’. (Ok, I don’t have a rubber duck, I just used my imagination there, though I might get a special one if I come into some money). Another great idea is to find music videos, from the Spice Girls to Wagner to Louis Armstrong, and say something like ‘this is clearly a song about leprosy’ and wait for a whole barrage of ‘WTFs’. Again, sadly I lack the balls to do so. :( Do YOU? No only joking, don’t go there. Welllll….. No, don’t. Byesybyebye!