It’s the start of the month! That means another contest blog! Yet again, the best entry has got me scratching my head. In the past, I’ve wondered if a performer and potential contender should be just plain ignored because he/she was clearly mentally ill (don’t worry about it though, it’s ok - you’re an artist) and in this case I’ve been pondering whether crime is ok to joke about. Mild crime, I mean. Of course SERIOUS crime is never good; murder is a big no no, as is bank robbery. However to me, stealing a large remote control car and joyriding it is funny, as I wrote about that topic in my book ‘One Screwy Week’. Of course that was fictional, not autobiographical, but I’d certainly laugh if that ever happened.
Taking things up a notch, is contest winner Cath Molloy funny for unknowingly assisting a cat thief offender when she was 14? If the animal was stolen from a person no, but from a pet store and if the individual responsible got caught, as was the case? Possibly. How did she get caught? By an army of cats? That could work. Even when the animals lick their lips, some people giggle; I guess they’re naturally comic. Unfortunately the criminal got captured by the police which isn’t quite as radical, but it still makes an interesting story, which is fine. You can’t be all jokes constantly. There were gags in Molloy’s routine, but one of the main strengths of her performance was her confidence. She could be a celebrity if she keeps working on her presentability. (And of course if there is ever a celebrity shortage, for whatever reason).
Her quips, then. She lightheartedly says her ‘father’ is called Hiro Mizushima (at least I think that’s what she said), and because of the foreign name, jokes that she’s adopted. It turns out Hiro is a 34 year old actor, making him younger than the performer, so either there is another, older person of the same name or I simply misheard. Of course there is always the tragic possibility Molloy is going through a serious nervous breakdown, but that is extremely unlikely as the way she presents herself is completely normal and healthy. Long term readers will know I bring up the topic of insanity often, which may say a lot about me. However, I just think I’m considering all options. Nice and harmless. Anyway, why don’t you try and solve the puzzle of who Mr. Mizushima could be, by watching Cath’s performance below, then doing some research?…
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https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=403652120420678
Now let’s talk about me again! This time my topic of choice is health and beauty. I’ve noticed that if I don’t shave for a few days, I start to look older than I really am. However, I mostly don’t think much of that fact as getting hairier is a very gradual process. When I do finally use my razor, it looks like I’ve turned a few years younger in just a few minutes, creating much more of a surprise. If you don’t like the thought of ageing, try my patented method and you too can start to feel great many times a year. What’s best is it’s completely free! Simon’s wonder shave of youth! Spread the message and reap the rewards, now! And on that narcissistic though inspirational note… Bye!