This month’s sketch competition was a little unfair as there were three relatively short videos from the contestants and one epic 16-minuter. So what do I do? Using my expert and well though out judgement, I thought a penalty of exactly 0.59 points would be just. Amazingly, the first, unedited scores I gave were 3.55 out of 5, 3.6, 3.95 and 4.55… With the penalty, the last score would be 3.96. Talk about a close event! It’s not a truly bizarre contest, however. Because of the whole lockdown business in Australia, people obviously aren’t performing standup comedy so much, there. (Well you can try, but you might get arrested. Fittingly, I guess that could be funny, but only if you’re a particularly unlikeable person). As the standup site I borrow from every two months is Australian, there has been next to no videos to choose from and again, my messages often seem to go unnoticed in spam folders. So I’m stuck. Maybe next month’s standup contest will feature no competitors. Again, that would be weird, but I’m being serious, too. As in ‘Special Thumb Up Goes to… No one!’ That could sound bitter making me sound like a comedy asshole, but as explained, it’s not.
About the winning video by Shawn Parke, then… Here it is!…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=adalTTEpTSk
As you can see, it’s a completely made up story about the old Nintendo Entertainment System. The tragedy is, (here we go again) when I was around 15 I would have taken it very seriously. I hope Shawn realises schizophrenia affects about 1% of the population at some time. So if he gets any messages such as ‘I love what you’re doing, man. That was a real eye opener!’, now he knows what’s going on. Yep, that was another schizo comment from me. Again, if you want something really new and special, wait till next month. Maybe. Some of the highlights of this video are the completely unintelligible handwriting that is even worse than mine, and the teacher’s comment ‘I don’t know what is wrong with your boy, but there IS something wrong with your boy.’ That’s a comment that has haunted me throughout my life. Even after the age of 18 and into my 30s. I’m so relieved to say the comment is actually funny. Phew. All ok. Another highlight includes the report card saying stuff like ‘I can recognise red: Grade C. I can recognise blue: Grade C’, etc. It’s kind of one of those ‘you had to be there things’. Watch the video and you’ll laugh. Trust me.
Now to change the subject! Not long ago, I was in traffic in front of a very angry driver who kept shouting at me. I literally had no idea what he was going on about as the loudness didn’t improve clarity, then I realised an ambulance was trying to get passed me. Whoops. However, I would later find out the ‘raging do-gooder’ overtook me and a couple of other people quite dangerously. Obviously that makes him somewhat of a hypocrite as ironically HE was a serious danger to other people’s health. Both physical and mental. Luckily I’m not always the victim of road rage, sometimes I’m an observer. A while ago another angry individual shouted at a completely innocent though perhaps annoying motorist ‘What kind of a **** are you?!’ I was thinking to myself ‘I’m glad that wasn’t directed at me. I have no idea what kind of a **** I am. I don’t even know how many types there are. Without a doubt, I’d give a bad answer. Maybe I should ponder my type now if a similar question gets asked in the future. Hm. Anyway… Bye!